


Anchors

by letmegeekatyou



Series: Pillow Talk [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-24
Updated: 2014-04-24
Packaged: 2018-01-20 16:22:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1517177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letmegeekatyou/pseuds/letmegeekatyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel worries his wings will pull him away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anchors

After he got his grace back, Cas felt...disconnected from the world around him. As a human, he had felt heavy, his feet firm on the ground and his body always pulled toward it so that he had to keep it upright or fall. The air would settle on him, push him around, the sunlight would warm his skin and make him feel wrapped in the substance of the earth, part of its comforting solidity. The gravity that troubled him at first came to feel like an embrace, especially as he began to understand the pleasures of being held and held down and the joys of being _under_ \--under a roof, under a blanket, under _Sam_.

With his grace restored, though, he felt anxious, as though it could somehow lift him away without his consent. Although he perceived the warmth of the sun, it hovered a millimeter above his skin so that he could not _feel_ it. The sheltering roof of the bunker, the clouds when it rained--they all felt insubstantial, and Cas felt perpetually exposed.

Sam could see it in his eyes and in the way he touched things, which he did more and more often, as if to reassure himself that he was part of this world and wouldn't be pulled away from it. He could feel it when they were in bed, in Cas's restlessness and the way he tugged Sam's arm around him even in his sleep, pulling until Sam was practically on top of him. Sam asked what was going on, but Cas wouldn't talk about it, except once, when he was almost asleep, he mumbled something about not wanting to float away.

Finally, Sam decided to do something about it. One night, when Cas had climbed into bed, Sam sat beside him, kissed his forehead, and told him to stay still.

"Why? Aren't you coming to bed?"

"In a minute," Sam answered, moving to the end of the bed and pushing the sheet and comforter firmly under the mattress.

"What are you doing?" Cas asked, raising himself on his elbows and looking suspicious as Sam made his way to his own side of the bed.

"Lay down. Cas, angels have this reputation for being above it all, sitting on clouds and watching from far away, right?" He gave the blankets a sharp tug, sliding his had into the crease under the mattress to make sure they would stay put. "But you're not like most angels. You're different. You're mine." Sam paused for a minute, smiling affectionately at Cas, who smiled back despite himself. Sam walked over to Cas's side of the bed and began repeating his operation.

"Cas, you belong to me. You belong _with_ me. I'm your...your cloud. I'm your anchor. I'm home." He knelt beside Cas, who was now practically immobilized under the tightened blankets, and ran his fingers through his hair. "You can't float away from me," he whispered, laying his hand on top of the comforter, just over Cas's heart. "I will always hold onto you. I will tuck you in every night, and I will hold your hand, and I won't let go."

When Sam leaned in for a kiss, Cas could feel the weight of him through his hands and his lips, in the safety and warmth that radiated from him. It was like the way the sun had felt, a reassuring pressure that lingered even when Sam pulled away as the sheets held him to the mattress and Sam's gaze held him still and content.

"Come to bed, Sam." Sam glanced at his handiwork and laughed.

"Not sure I'll fit now, Cas." But Castiel had freed one arm from the sheets and was pulling him down, and he was happy to let gravity take over and pull him into the angel's embrace.

"I think," Cas murmured into his ear, "you can find a way."


End file.
